On Being Ordinary

[Song of the Day: "Ordinary People" by John Legend]...repeat for a reason

I get wet everytime I hear that song, I swear. It catches me off-guard -- I don't have the CD -- so like when I am driving and I hear the first
few bars
of the piano
playing
on the radio. I get butterflies, and I gotta turn it up

LOUD

I gotta mini-crush on ol' boy cuz of this song. Love me some John Legend.

It slays me, every . single . time ....what is THAT all about?

Reality Check:

"Girl I'm in love with you..."
It's been Y E A R S, truly. I haven't heard that in years, nor have I genuinely said that to a brotha in at least 7 years, and yes, I am counting. The last time I was in love wasn't in this century. Ain't THAT a damn shame?

"...honeymoon...infatuation phase...thick of love...seems like we argue everyday..."
Oh, I've had my share of flings and things -- encounters, yanno? But this ain't about them. With any mutual attraction there is a honeymoon phase, but being in the "thick" of LOVE with another, that is fully present in the relationship...dare I say I miss that?

"...And though love sometimes hurts I still put you first...
That is what it is...I put MYSELF first, and have done so, to the apparent detriment of my romantic, loving relationships. I hurt, so I took care of myself -- I couldn't rely on another to do that. I haven't trusted another man to love me in 7 years -- for one reason or another, the encounters have always fallen
short
and I was always left feeling as if
I/we
wasn't/weren't
put
first
when I wonder now if that was because I wasn't fully putting the relationship first either.
I had work -- class -- friends -- travel -- family -- illness -- other "issues" to work on (fill in the blank here __________________) -- and never enough TIME to put up with the "bullshit" of a relationship. Talk about a self-fufilling prophecy...

"...But maybe we'll grow we never know baby you and I..."
Do I have any regrets? When it comes to L O V E I'm one who falls easily -- the nature of romance, of love, appeals to me in a great way. And even though I've learned lessons from the encounters I have had, from flings, things and the last time I was IN LOVE, I'd be lying if I said I didn't regret something from how things dissolved. Each encounter left a mark. I guess I wish that I had less encounters and more love...seen something
grow

. . .

since you never know....

"...We're just ordinary people we don't know which way to go...maybe we should
T A K E . I T . S L O W"
I am all for that...S L O W. Learning to live, love, trust, give, take, and share with a brotha. Afterall, it seems to work. I'm seeing evidence of that -- so far, I've got 3 friends getting married this year, and of the couples, two of them have known each other at least 10 years. After it all, I guess they figured out which way to go, eh?

Which is why I love this song so much -- I hear confirmation in the ordinary.

Set to a beautiful melody, of course....



Talk 2 me about it....